Friday, October 20, 2006

Heartbreak

Date: Oct. 19
Total mileage: 36.0
October mileage: 269.7
Temperature upon departure: 49

I'm really not a sports fan.

I'm fair-weather to the very extreme. Meaning: I have no clue about backstories or statistics or strategies or, sometimes, even the basic rules. I carry all of this eye-rolling apathy into random games where everything is on the line and everything matters and everything comes down to one heart-stopping moment.

I always get sucked into the drama.

I always have my heart broken.

It happened in 1996 when the Alta High School basketball dynasty dropped right out of the bottom.

It happened in 1997 when the Utah Jazz lost the last two games in the championship series, both of which came down to three or four points right at the very end, to the Chicago Bulls.

It happened to me in 1998 when the University of Utah clawed their way into the NCAA championship series only to lose to Kentucky.

After the late '90s, my interest in basketball mostly dried up. I was happy again, as apathetic as ever. Then I had to go and meet a person who talks continuously about baseball, even in January, and somehow dragged me into the forlorn world of the modern Mets fan.

So the Mets lost to the Cardinals in Game 7 of the NLCS. How does that affect my life? How does it change anything for me?

Exactly. So why did I sit there for three hours, fresh off a fairly hard bike ride and coping with a stress-induced 90-beats-per-minute heart rate?

Why did a literally, involuntarily, jump off the ground when Chavez leapt like 14 feet beyond the back wall to steal that home run away? Why did I sneer and become so incensed by that Cardinal guy with the stupid red soul patch hanging off his chin like a dead caterpillar? Why do I feel so sick inside? I could barely eat dinner.

I'm so confused. I don't even like baseball.

I think that's it for me. Destiny has given me the rare (or maybe not so rare) ability to be driven to emotional extremes by distant events but the wherewithal to choose apathy.

Sweet, stagnant apathy.

7 comments:

  1. Sorry about your Mets. (Why are you a Mets fan, anyway? Did you live in NYC?)

    I'm glad the Cardinals won the NLCS (I live in StL, so what can I say), but like you said in this post - I don't really care either (!)... It's all just in good fun - and a lot of money, for some!! The news was saying that every local playoff game brings $3 million into the city.

    I guess that's the nature of being a fan - going crazy. But I never really got why people go so nuts over it? It's mostly madness, but you won't catch me out there tipping over cars with the mob!

    And besides... from what everyone is saying; the Mets or the Cards, either will be easily demolished by the Detroit Tigers. It would be exciting if the Cardinals won, what with their new stadium and all (hey, somebody has to pay for that damn thing!), but my expectations are not exactly sky high.

    Relax, Alaska! You're surrounded by immense natural beauty. There's a reason why STL is referred to "the best baseball fans in the world" -- because it's ALL WE GOT here in this mid-west dump!!!!

    That was a fun series to watch. Very close!

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  2. I read this on the 'net, so, it HAS to be true:

    "Apathy will set you free."

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  3. Jill, there's room on the Cardinals bandwagon if you should change your mind and care about the World Series.

    I've written about the Cards' NLCS win on my blog, complete with the front page I designed for Friday's edition of the Belleville (IL) News-Democrat. Frankly, I'm surprised the Cardinals made it this far, but here's hoping the little guys continue to come up big in the Series!

    Daniel, I really don't understand where you're coming from with your comments about St. Louis:

    "There's a reason why STL is referred to "the best baseball fans in the world" -- because it's ALL WE GOT here in this mid-west dump!!!!"

    Sure, St. Louis has its flaws and it may not have the incredible beauty of Alaska, but if you look hard enough, you can find lots of subtle beauty in the nearby countryside in Missouri and Illinois. That subtle beauty is much easier to find in October as the leaves turn.

    Within a 100-mile radius of St. Louis, you'll find the best mountain biking in the Midwest. Next September, Missouri will play host to an elite bicycle race, the Tour of Missouri. Nearby Madison County (IL) has developed 85 miles of bicycle trails that are popular with cyclists.

    Daniel, I also suggest that you pay a visit to the Gateway Arch, the St. Louis Art Museum, the St. Louis Symphony, the Missouri Botanical Garden, the Italian restaurants of The Hill and even the St. Louis Zoo. You really might be surprised by what you find.

    GO CARDS!!!!

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  4. Roger - If you bothered to take a look at my blog before your ridiculous rant, you would have seen what my last few posts were about: Tour of Missouri, Gateway Arch, Forest Park...

    I wasn't being totally serious, but I'm glad you love STL so much.

    Where did you go to high school? (Joke. The famous, or infamous STL question.)

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  5. Daniel, sorry that I couldn't tell that you were just joking. It's good to know you love St. Louis too! I should have realized the joke was aimed toward folks in the rest of the nation who don't know what assets we have here.

    I didn't know you had a blog. On first glance, it looks like a pretty interesting one. I'll have to take a closer look at it later ... after Game One of course!

    GO CARDS!

    P.S.: To answer the infamous St. Louis question, Southwestern H.S. in Piasa, Ill., about 50 miles north of STL. :)

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  6. Go Cats!!!! i know the rest of the nation for us toothless, shoeless, egeecashunless hillbillies, but i live in the bluegrass and have been and will always be a Cats fan. and the '98 Utes weren't that good.

    you sure have me licked on miles though...and pics. tailwinds

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  7. err..."the rest of the nation has disdain for us..." proves a point i guess.

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